The brink...

It's amazing to me how close we all seem to be teetering on the edge of insanity. I don't know about the rest of the world, but I know that there are times when I feel buried and overwhelmed and driven to the brink of craziness by work or girls or family or politics or religion or a number of other things over which I have no control.

Sigh...

Let's consider work. Many of us take this part of life for granted, as if it needs to be here and we need to participate. Taking this one step further, we feel like work takes us for granted, that we are just another cog on the gear, just another robot on the assembly line. Some of us simply accept it for what it is, and others will try to fight through the system, looking at being made from a robot to a robot operator or from a cog to the whole gear, maybe even the whole gear box. When one considers that here, in America, the average CEO makes over 400 times the salary of their average employee, it has the effect of making the robot realize that they are simply that. Robots. Maybe it will be a depressing fact that's accepted and thrown out of the head before the next day's work. Or, maybe, it will make a small percentage of these robots step back and realize that they are more than robots. They're not puppets! They're real boys! And they'll stop playing the game and start living a life more fulfilling and joyous than previously imagined.

I could make equally powerful statements about relationships, family, politics, and many, many other realms of life, but I suppose the moral of the story would almost always be the same. We all have the power and the patience and the will to take a deep look into our own souls, to see what makes us tick and what makes us complacent. Sometimes this is a very long and arduous process. Hell, if it wasn't that way for me, this blog wouldn't exist. Still, it should be necessary for everyone.

Alas, it's amazing how close we all seem to be teetering on the edge of insanity.

Chili for a chilly evening...

I found a new recipe for chili this past weekend, and so I tried it out. It was delicious. I will send the recipe to anyone who asks, but rest assured it was spicy and f@#$ing awesome.

We got a few inches of snow here in Denver. It's cold, but not unbearable. There's more snow in the forecast, but it's all good. I'm warm with chili and friendship. That is the best kind of warm (especially when you have a beer to chase it all down).

Oasis

I often ask people one of my favorite "old person sayings". These are quirky and weird quotations asked by the greatest generation, like "whaddaya know?" or "whaddaya think?" My favorite happens to be, "what's the good word?"

Today, I asked a co-worker that question, and we spoke. We talked about forgiveness in the context of people who we can consider to be abominations to humanity. Is it possible to forgive those who have wronged so many tens, hundreds, thousands, or even millions of lives? Is it possible, even, to forgive God or science for taking those lives so dear to us without any explanation or cause?

The good word of the day was coined by my co-worker to be "Oasis". I pondered this for a while, and looked up the definition of the word. I found "1 : a fertile or green area in an arid region (as a desert) 2 : something that provides refuge, relief, or pleasant contrast". So I'm wrapping my head around the idea that to forgive ultimately leads us to our oasis. We are drawn to a sacred space where we have the capacity within our hearts to forgive and enjoy the fertile grenery of our oasis.

It's been a deep afternoon.

Sunset off the Boulder Turnpike

One thing that continually amazes me about this world of ours is the power the sun has to make a thing as simple as the sky more beautiful than everything else around it.  My friend Dan and I were talking a while back, and he was telling me about how he would point things such as this sunset out to people.

"Look!" he'd say to them.

"At what?" they would ask, confused. "The sky?"

I can relate to his frustration in that this isn't JUST a sky or a sunset, but it's something much more intricate. Whether you chose to understand the complication of light rays being refracted through ice and water crystals in molecules in clouds bending the colors we see, or you choose to believe a more divine painting on this gigantic canvas, a painting by the hand of God Himself... whichever you choose, this is so much more than just the sky. This is an abstract idea. This sunset is to "the sky" as a diamond is to "a rock", as a wedding is to dating, so much more than just trivial words.

Inspiration and beauty are, in fact, in the eyes of the beholder. It's not what you see, but how you decide to see it.

Dinner

I cooked a meal tonight.  One can of Ranch Style Beans. One package Uncle Ben's microwave rice. One can Valley Fresh Chicken Breast. Combine and heat over MSR Pocket Rocket camp stove. Delicious! Throw in some dried pineapples and some V8, and you've got yourself a cheap and easy and healthy dinner that touches on every food group. Yay!

So for some reason, I'm choosing to blog about food instead of President Obama's Inaguration today. Truth be told, I'm amazed that we elected him at all, and really damn proud of this country for taking this step forward together. When he speaks, I want to enlist. It's his talk of sacrifice and work that make me proud of my lifestyle choice, to know that working for a better self will allow me to work for a better country, a better society. He's almost like a fictional character that's larger than life. I feel when he speaks like I do when I hear Captain Sisko speak on Star Trek or like I hear Jesus speak in the Bible.

So yeah... my dinner tonight was extra delicious.

Philosophy in a can (or van)

I lay here, tucked away in a Denver city park, listening to the Valley Highway traffic drown out the flock of geese that just flew over. I just read part of what I understand to be a great, great book about determination and the good things in life. I'm looking forward to reading "Atlas Shrugged" in its entirety. It will undoubtedly keep me company during the cold and lonely nights here in this BattleWagon.

The weather is crisp, but not cold here in the Mile High City. My day was warm, and I heard a rumor that I have a reader on this blog who is a big-time movie guy. Hat's off to him for being the guy who makes the other guys what they are. I admire the gusto of not being so over-absorbed in oneself that one can't appreciate the ideas and projects and doings of other people who are sharing their lives, too.

The Irish Blessing

Lately, I've felt lost. Usually, when I feel lost, I found even the most trivial things to be profound... a scratched street sign, a line from a children's movie, a lyric on a song on a station hardly listen to. A few days ago, a friend told me to look up the Irish Blessing. I found this poem extremely moving, and I thought I would share it.

May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of his hand.

May God be with you and bless you:
May you see your children's children.
May you be poor in misfortune,
Rich in blessings.
May you know nothing but happiness
From this day forward.

May the road rise up to meet you
May the wind be always at your back
May the warm rays of sun fall upon your home
And may the hand of a friend always be near.

May green be the grass you walk on,
May blue be the skies above you,
May pure be the joys that surround you,
May true be the hearts that love you.

Truth be told, as I search for whatever inspiration it is I am seeking, I find more and more clues to unravelling the bigger picture. Unfortunately, with every clue I find, I discover the bigger picture is exponentially bigger than I had concieved before. It's funny how that works. The more you know, the less you really know.

Keep on the search. Keep on looking.